I remember a time in my 20's walking directly home after work in the city and I panicked. I panicked because I had nothing to do.
Most evenings after a long days work I had something on. I was ALWAYS busy doing something. And this one day there was nothing to do after work and I freaked.
Then I paused, reflected, felt into that feeling and realized that every ounce of my busy life was to avoid feeling alone, and being busy helped me falsely feel like I was kind of an important person. I was busy. It hit me in a flash and it hit hard.
Now with wisdom from experience and decades of living life, I laugh at that.
I love nothing more than some solitude and alone time. And I never feel alone.
I LOVE not being busy. It’s so aligned with who I am at the core of my being that I can’t fathom how I did busy all those years.
If someone asked you, what's the most important thing in your life right now, how would you answer?
I asked myself this very question, and it's presence. Being present, surrendered, awake.
That's the top line for me. Every other thing pales.
I'm not interested in making a six figure salary
Not interested in self-improvement that comes from feeling less
Not interested in building a legacy
I don't judge any of that, because I have come to realize that being present, surrendered and awake takes care of the unfolding of life.
If one is meant to have a six figure salary, for example, it will happen.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you don’t have to put in the effort. I can hear the protests. It only happens if you put in the effort. Yes, true.
But consider this:
When there is a strong desire for those things, you put in the effort effortlessly because you want it. You want it because it’s your soul-seeded desires that pull you strongly to do so. Not everyone’s desires are the same.
Conditioning versus true desire
And when there is no desire for something, and you effort towards it because you THINK you should be doing that, then it’s conditioning. Yep.
I have had conditioning that had me falsely chasing things that aren’t really true desires for me.
For example, I have to make a lot of money to be successful was a conditioning in me. It’s false. It’s something I picked up from outside of myself and I realized it was making me very unhappy to chase after this.
It’s important to me to be true to who I am.
That’s a lifetime exploration and unravelling of conditioning. It’s the same for everyone. De-conditioning back to who you truly are.
It starts with being present, surrendered, awake.
From there we are shown, guided, and we take responsibility for what needs to happen next. One step at a time.
It’s not about doing it all alone without asking for help. Even the need for asking becomes apparent when it’s necessary.
Life is fluid, flowing, and magical when we stop listening to our mind and trust in our own inner authority to guide us in living aligned to our soul blueprint.